I realise, you hate me alot. You don't have to say cause the way you show your reaction towards me, I can already see. Who am i to you? Can you answer that to me? Or maybe I already know what's your answer. But is this the way you want to treat me all the way? How about the others? Why don't you treat them just like me? I never see you did that so. I can say NEVER. It's always me. Am i that bad? Am i? Or maybe i am. That's why i deserve all this shits from you. You know what, if only I can tell you straight in the face that I hate you. Too bad i can't cause you're someone fucking special to me. YES, if only you can read this fucker. I'm sure you'll cry your lungs out. You never understand my feelings, not even once. You hurt me alot. Hey, people makes mistakes. Don't tell me you never did? You're such a impatient bugger. Yeah, impatient freak. Even she hates you for this, i can bet. Gosh! Hey c'mon I'm 16 already.. what more do you expect from me? I'm mature enough to think for myself you bugger. You don't have to tell me what to do. I can't wait to get out man. I don't wish to see your face anymore. Infact, i don't think i need you AT ALL. You can't even control your tantrum. Why must i be the punching bag? This is not the first nor the second time. Its been alot of times yknow? But i dont think you realise it. You called me names, scold me for what i DIDN'T do, scold me for such little stuffs. Oh god, help me lah.. For goodness sake, why is my life like this? I dont know what to say. What happen to the old us? Why are you acting this way? Can't you just forgive and forget the past? Is it that hard for you? You dumbass. You make me angry, but all i can do is keep it to myself. Thats all. My friends cant do anything about it, not even my bestie. Sigh. You say stuffs that i don't like to hear. You think that doesn't hurt me? You think you're the only one thats hurt badly inside? Then think, what about those words... I know you didn't mean it cause you're angry but what if you do? Don't you think I'm hurt too? I know it'll hurt just for awhile but I don't think i'll forget about it. Not at all, all this hurtful memories will forever stay with me. Thanks alot, I'll always be here.. to be your punching bag, fucker.
Farhanah Binti Mohd.